Do you ever think about what would happen if one little minor event in your life (from your past) was changed? Saying no to an invitation for a date, choosing a different college or the discipline you majored in, deciding not to move, rejecting a job offer or promotion. Each yes and each no would change the direction your life takes and the people you will meet.
Last night, the boys and I were packed up and headed to Jackson for Dee Dee’s birthday weekend. A weekend of fun and family. We were just outside of Clinton, MS when I ran out of gas. Yes, ran out of gas. The gauge said just under 1/4 of a tank and the gas light did not come. The mileage to empty said 44 miles. I had plenty of time to get gas. Needless to say, I have to call my mom and tell her that her 38-year-old daughter just ran out of gas. JT was asleep for a while and Xander was nervous about sitting on the side of the interstate in the dark.
Sitting there in the dark with my two guys, it really hit me how if anything in my life had been different, I would not be sitting in the dark with those two boys. Maybe with two other kids, maybe with no kids, maybe a different car, maybe not travelling at all, maybe having to fly in rather than drive.
Every little thing that happened in my life lead to meeting Tommy and the life we have together.
What if my parents had not divorced and we never left Clarksdale? What if mom had taken a job in Memphis rather than Jackson after the divorce? What if I didn’t have Dianne Waldon had not started the Advanced Chemistry class at Northwest Rankin? Would I have found my way to a major in chemical engineering? What if I didn’t go to Mississippi State, but went to one of the other dozen universities I applied to? What if I didn’t wait to take Physics until the summer? What if I never talked to the boy sitting next to me in Physics lab that summer of 1995? What if he left to go co-op on the MS coast and we just said good-bye that summer? What if we never had rough patches and never broke up for a few months? What if when we did talk again, I had said no to that first invitation to a crawfish boil, or had hesitated before saying yes?
Everything would have been different. Every little decision that didn’t seem all that important lead to this marriage and these two boys and this life. Every little unimportant, seemingly insignificant event lead to this life. Which I wouldn’t trade for anything in the world.
When I did call him later last night to tell him about our night (while he is off at a convention for his motorcycle club), first was the worry in his voice then the laughter. Because this is who we are. I am the woman who pushes her car to the limit and doesn’t fill up before leaving town, and he is the guy that cracks up that his wife would leave town without a full tank of gas. No lecture on checking my car, no fussing about what was I thinking, just a laugh that summed it all up.
That said, obviously something was wrong with the car because the gas light always comes on at 30 miles to empty and the numbers always flash at 30. To run out of gas with 44 miles left to empty really wasn’t my fault.
The moral of this story…say yes, take a chance, open up to new adventures. You don’t know where it’s going to go, but the ride is worth it and that one thing that seemed unimportant could be the one event that introduces you that person that changes everything.